4 Things Parents Should Never Do in IEP Meetings (And What to Do Instead)
Without knowing it, you may be undermining the ultimate goal of the meeting: getting the best outcome for your child.
IEP sessions can be a little nerve-wracking for everyone because of the conference table, acronyms, and endless paperwork. You are a member of the IEP (Individualized Education Program) “team,” which includes teachers, therapists, an administration, and you, at the IEP meeting for your child. A successful IEP for your kid is the result of the contributions made by each member of the team.
You can feel relieved knowing your child is receiving assistance while you’re in the IEP meeting. You might be upset because the school doesn’t seem to be listening to your concerns. Alternatively, you can experience anxiety and discomfort when speaking in front of a group of businesspeople.
You are ultimately the first to speak out for your child, but here’s how to do it without going too far.
1. Bulldoze
In an IEP meeting, there is a lot of information to cover, and it could be tempting to take charge. But keep in mind that you can overlook crucial information if you’re bulldozing others. Your opinion of what’s best could be altered by comments from the present instructors, administrators, and other specialists. The main objective of the meeting—getting the greatest result for your child—might be undermined if you’re waiting to speak at the first opportunity rather than listening.
Instead, prepare yourself with knowledge so that you can focus on and make your major arguments. You should familiarize yourself with what is in the district’s parent handbook by reading it. Know every detail of your child’s IEP. Demand a
IEP meetings may be emotionally charged. After all, this meeting is about your child. But it is unacceptable to yell, reprimand, or otherwise put someone in a bad mood. And if you lose your composure, the team might adjourn the meeting, which would put you right back where you were.
Instead, try to maintain your composure. Have a few phrase openers that help you focus on the task at hand rather than your emotions. Something like, “Let’s revisit…” or “I really want to focus on…” It’s acceptable to take a break if you start to feel very hot. (say you have to use the restroom and then use the time to cool down).
3. Bend too much
You, as the parent, offer useful details that can aid the team in deciding on placement, objectives, and accommodations. It’s simple to become overwhelmed, especially when evaluating statistics or talking about behaviour in a meeting. You have a right to comprehend everything that is being discussed, from the findings of the evaluation to the implications of each IEP component for your kid. Don’t stand by and let the IEP team to move through with a plan that you don’t comprehend or with which you disagree.
Instead: It’s crucial to urge the team to pause and clarify if you’re feeling intimidated or uneasy. Say, “Thank you for including this, can you explain…” or “I’m not sure I understand, can you tell me…” to give others the benefit of the doubt.
4. Be silent
Similar to doctor’s appointments, IEP sessions can seem like one side knows everything. While it’s important to listen, it’s not acceptable if you’re made to feel as though you have no voice at all. You have crucial details to impart, including everything from your child’s present likes and dislikes to sleeping patterns and official diagnoses. Although they could be authorities in their profession, you are the parent of your child. The ideal strategy is to work together.
Instead, direct your question to your child’s teacher or another trusted adult if you have a question but are feeling overwhelmed. It’s acceptable if it’s answered by another adult.
If you find yourself extremely stuck, you might want to bring in some help.
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